05:26AM
Dear Apa,
I saw you yesterday. We were riding the same jeepney to Malolos City and then my life has changed in an instant. It was bizarre. And if you want to know the truth, I do realize that it sounds kind of creepy to you. You may think I’m psychotic, but I dare say it was love at first sight.
Now that’s insane, isn’t it? I don’t know how it feels like to get affection from someone you don’t even know at all, but I’m pretty sure that it will freak the hell out of you. Man, I’m so sorry about that! I don’t mean to be like some deranged stalker or something, I may be somewhat deranged but at least I’m not a stalker. Or at least not by now! I’m going to be honest to you, I plan on tracking you down; I could search for your name on Facebook or anywhere in the World Wide Web – internet is just so wonderful for this kind of stuff, don’t you think? But really, I don’t know what to do next. Should I talk to you? If I do, I’m not sure you’re just going to freak out and ignore me. But it’s the best thing I could think about at the moment. My semi-psychotic, wholly neurotic mind can’t seem to function well right now as I still don’t get me some sleep. I have been trying to memorize every single detail of your face the whole freaking night, kind of afraid that if I sleep, I’d wake up only to forget what you look like. I don’t want to misremember those cute little eyes. The ones that never looked my way and let me down. It was depressing! I was kind of hoping that you’d look at me, but you didn’t. But that’s okay! At least you failed to notice how I stared at you half the trip. It’s funny, we were just inches away and yet you were unaware that I had been watching you all along. Don’t you think I’m such a good stalker?
By the way, I want to thank you for your tattoo. If it wasn’t for it, I’m not going to know your name. I know it could be that it’s someone else’s name you have there inked on your forearm, but I sensed that the name is yours. I’ve seen a lot of guys with similar tattoos and it’s always their names they have on that area. Miggy Chavez has one. And Chito Miranda too. So I assumed what you have there is not anybody else’s name. But does it really matter if it is actually your name or not? I would want to call you Apa whether it is what you are actually called or not. I guess what’s important is that I can address you properly now that I am writing you this letter – and the next many letters I plan to write to you. I don’t want to talk to you like, “Dear You, whatever your name is” because it’s rude to talk that way. And the last thing I want to do is to be rude to you because I don’t want to get you upset.
Hey Apa, from now on, I’m going to write to you on regular basis, is that alright? I want to tell you things about me and my so-called life so that if you get to read these rants, you’re going to know me too. Let’s get to know each other!
Oh my God, this is ridiculous. What the hell am I thinking? Do I really think I’m going to have the chance to know you? Chances are I’m never even going to track you down or you are not really going to give a damn. Whatever! I’m still going to write to you, if it is any consolation.
It’s me,
Tuesday
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