People Change

August 24, 2011

02:41AM

Dear Apa,

I just checked Ralph Jhonel's blog and found this image he reblogged 1 week ago. I had to cry to this, you know. I mean, it wasn't mentioned there whether the post was for me or for anyone else, but the fact that he posted it only proves that it is how he treats friends — even if they were best friends the year before. So maybe it makes everything clearer now. Maybe not crystal, but at least less muddled enough to reflect his true feelings. He wants everybody to know that people change. That he himself is changed. That he is not the person I once knew.

I felt so bad about it all of a sudden. There's really nothing I can do now to win our friendship back. It's the last thing I want to happen, Apa. But as the days drag on, it gets more frustrating than I can ever handle. I feel like I'm falling little by little into pieces and to be honest with you, I wish I could just die. How can he ever do this to me? I did nothing but love him and I didn't even asked him for anything in return. I contented my self with being just friends with him because I don't want to lose him. But still he's changed.

I wish I could tell him all these. But there's no way he's gonna give a damn. I wish I could ask of him to at least try to keep in touch with our friends. I don't want him to do to them what he did to me. I want them all to remain friends. I'm sure I'm going to be happy to see that. As for me, I will just watch them from a distance where I will try not to make any sound so I won't have to disturb them. I will just smile to my self because I know I'm going to see how they keep a strong friendship between each and everyone of them. I will try not to force my way into the scene, so that they could all forget I ever existed. They could live their lives without me.

I know I'm being too emotional. I know I might just be jumping into conclusions. But I don't know better, Apa. I'm hopeless!

People change. So I guess I should just change myself.

it's me (or is it still me?),
Tuesday